Finding long-lasting happiness

By Jordan Hannan

As if she always had a dozen invisible balloons tied to her wrist, my close friend Kate is smiling every waking moment. Like her, there are some people that just seem so ecstatic to be alive, as though they personally selected that day’s shade of blue to color the sky. A seemingly simple characteristic, continuous genuine happiness, is becoming increasingly rare, and therefore even more admirable.

Fleeting happiness? Incredibly easy to find: a vacation, a night out, an A on a test, or winning a championship. Any of these events, while exciting in the moment, have no longevity when it comes to providing your life with value. The satisfaction of an A on a test fades with the impending anxiety of the next exam. The same goes for a family vacation: leading up to and during your trip, you are a flurry of anticipation and gratitude. However, as soon as the plane lands back in RDU, the longing for the next holiday begins. Finding “happiness” in momentary experiences or materialistic achievements is not adequate when seeking to live a complete life. 

There are three ways to effectively eradicate this pattern of thinking revolving around temporary reward, while simultaneously replacing it with the unending positivity of a consistently cheerful person:

1. Notice other people. This is quite possibly the most overlooked habit, despite its effortlessness and impact. I could point out the stranger who complimented my outfit a year from now, which employee offered to carry my takeout to the car when I nearly lost the garlic bread, and which of my peers never fails to enter class with a greeting. It sounds incredibly easy to pick up a dropped toy for a preoccupied and overwhelmed father, to hold the door for someone balancing three boxes, or to actually remember your mail carrier's name, and that’s because it is. When you put in the extra--yet minimal--effort that it takes to notice other people, it brightens their day while freeing you from the cycle of thinking of only your own life.
   
2. Express gratitude in the moment. The concept of prioritizing gratitude, especially for the purpose of shared happiness, has become mainstream and feels redundant. However, the emphasis is always placed on internal thought, as if your appreciation must be contained to a ten-line list in the journal on your desk; this is beyond untrue. For some unknown reason, we seem to assume that everyone already knows that they’re loved, appreciated for their assistance, or cherished for the time spent with them. Usually, that is not the case, but, even if it is, they always deserve to hear it again. The kindest people I know gift flowers to the living, are always quick with a “thank you”, and spend their time and money giving back to the organizations that have served them. 
   
3. Find deeper meaning in the activities you already partake in. We all have a plethora of different hobbies and interests, and they certainly provide happiness, but they don’t necessarily offer lifelong value. However, there are endless nonprofit organizations, each with unique missions, that can allow you to turn your hobby into something that can benefit the lives of others. If you love baseball, become a mentor at Miracle League; if you ride horses, dedicate your time to helping young girls at CORRAL; if you love to cook, spend your  afternoons at A Place at the Table. By channeling your interests into service with meaning, you can incorporate your passions into your life in a more influential way, creating a domino effect of positivity. (Triangle Cares would love to connect you with the perfect nonprofit! Our site lists a variety of local charities to help you get started.)
   

Spreading positivity by finding your passion is easier said than done, so allow us to help you get started with next week’s blog. 

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